“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." (Luke 10:38-42)
Two Sisters, Which is Better… This is the way I often heard or interpreted this encounter with Jesus. For many years it left me feeling like I did not make the mark and I just needed to try harder. That is what strivers do, they try harder.
As Jesus and his disciples were on their way, he came to a village where a woman named Martha opened her home to him. She had a sister called Mary, who sat at the Lord’s feet listening to what he said. But Martha was distracted by all the preparations that had to be made. She came to him and asked, “Lord, don’t you care that my sister has left me to do the work by myself? Tell her to help me!”
“Martha, Martha,” the Lord answered, “you are worried and upset about many things, but few things are needed—or indeed only one. Mary has chosen what is better, and it will not be taken away from her." (Luke 10:38-42)
Two Sisters, Which is Better…
This is the way I often heard or interpreted this encounter with Jesus. For many years it left me feeling like I did not make the mark and I just needed to try harder. That is what strivers do, they try harder.
I have come to learn there is more to this encounter than the way I originally perceived it. Martha was focusing on extending hospitality to her guests and resented her sister for not assisting her in that task. Mary on the other hand sat at Jesus feet listening but had no regard for the need to offer hospitality as would have been customary in her culture.
Martha and Mary are two very different women and that becomes evident with the various accounts we read of them in scripture. Here, in this particular passage found in Luke 10, and then again in John 11 and John 12.
I don’t think Jesus was inferring that Mary was better than Martha but rather what Mary chose in that moment was a better choice. I have come to understand that this story is more about balance in our lives not about which woman is better. Balance that comes with knowing our particular bent or way of being and its potential pitfalls. As I have discovered and embrace these ways of doing and being in my own life, I am able to see the good in how God created me, all of me, with my own personality traits, gifts, talents, and the shortcomings.
The lesson of this story is not about becoming either Mary or Martha because both of these women’s personalities have merit and Jesus loved them both deeply. Some have said that Martha and Mary may have been the most important and prominent women in Jesus’ life outside of his mother. Upon study of all the passages that reference them, we get a clearer picture of how each of these women express their love and adoration to their dear friend and Lord, Jesus.
Here are a few nuggets I discovered as I spent time in these encounters.
Martha is hospitable, hardworking, and generous. It probably would be safe to say her love language is acts of service. She is practical and efficient and it appears she is more outgoing and social than Mary based on the fact that in two of the accounts mentioned, Martha came out to meet Jesus. The first mentioned in the above passage from Luke to open her home to him and His disciples. The next comes from John 11 when her brother “died”. Martha ran out to Jesus when she heard He was coming and notice that Mary stayed at home mourning her brother. In this encounter Mary expressed great faith and belief in Jesus.
The caution for Martha is to be all about the doing and failing to just be. Succumbing to the pressures of those things that seem pressing and the inability to rest in the presence of her Beloved friend and Lord. Jesus’ correction is not a rebuke but rather an invitation to just be…an extension of hospitality to her. I hear his gentle voice speak “Martha, Martha” as He invites her to a place to rest and receive from Him. To have her cup filled and not live off crumbs of busyness… to feast on the only thing that can bring life, the Word, or bread of life from the source. Jesus gently reminded Martha that Mary’s choice to sit at His feet was as important and, in this case, more so than frantic efforts and anxiety that often come with much serving…. balance
Mary, on the other hand, exhibited her ways of love and devotion towards Jesus by spending quality time at His feet. Attentive and soaking in His words and teachings in the midst of a society where such things were not done by women. Women were not permitted to be disciples and sit at the feet of a teacher or Rabbi. Mary shows she is not afraid to step outside of cultural norms and break cultural taboos in order to spend time with Jesus. Jesus affirms her and her actions by His word saying “Mary has chosen the better, and it will not be taken away from her” …. Just pause and reflect on that for a moment…let it sink into your very soul…”it will not be taken away from her” What a precious gift we all have access to, The Word of God that can never be taken from us …Beautiful
I also notice that Mary is dramatic, expressive, and lavish in her expressions of love and devotion to Jesus as we see in our next two encounters with her. First, we read earlier in John 11, Mary stayed in the house when Jesus arrived but when Martha went back and said to her” the Teacher is here and He is asking for you”, Mary quickly got up and ran to Jesus falling at His feet weeping. Her emotional response was so strong and honest that Jesus himself was deeply moved and brought to tears.
We next see Mary at yet another dinner hosted by Martha in honour of Jesus just six days before the Passover feast where she pours out a whole bottle, almost 2 cups worth, of expensive perfume over the very feet she sat at many times and wipe them with her hair…Can you picture the scene??!! Mary clearly is not worried about what others think as she expresses her devotion and love to Jesus. Oh, to be that bold…I also notice that Martha is doing what Martha does, serving other but this time she does not appear to be distracted but settled and attentive to her guests.
My biggest take away from these beautiful encounters is that it was alright to be a Martha type person. One that has the gift of hospitality, working hard to create a welcoming space in her home for people. The caution is to not become so busy in the preparing and serving that I am too stressed out to actually sit and be fully present with the guest and share at a heart level. What about you? Which sister do you resonate with? Do you need to add a bit more Martha to your devotion or a bit more Mary?
Blessings my friends,
Melody
